Talk:Harriet Lee (singer)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Z1720 (talk · contribs) 16:58, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, I will be reviewing this article in the coming days. If you post any questions or comments here, please ping me to ensure that I see it. Thanks! Z1720 (talk) 16:58, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Hi, thanks for nominating an article for GAN. It was a great read and I feel like I know a lot about her career now. I have put this article on hold pending some revisions. Below are some comments to improve the prose to GA standards.

Lede

"Golden Age of Radio" should not be in quotations unless you are quoting someone.
she was named "Miss Radio 1931" Is this an award she won? Who gave this award/held this contest? This should be mentioned in the lede and remove the quotation marks.
"Lee was one of the first singers to have a show on U.S. television. Her Harriet Lee show aired on experimental New York City station W2XAB (now WCBS-TV) in 1931." Merge these sentences into one sentence. Suggestion: "She hosted the Harriet Lee show on experimental New York City station W2XAB in 1931, making her one of the first singers to have a show on U.S. television."

Radio singer

I am surprised that Lee's birthday is not included in the article. Do you have that information? Any additional info about her life that is not about being a singer?
Any information about her mother? Did she have siblings? This would go at the beginning of the body of the article, perhaps in a new section called "Early life"
"many assumed they were hearing a man, "Bobby Lee", singing." Where did the name Bobby Lee come from? Was this a name given by the audience?
"Lee sang as part of the "Harmony Team" duet" who was the other person in the duet?
"the CBS affiliate at the time in Los Angeles." Delete "at the time"
"The Paramount Playhouse show included other musicians such as organist Jesse Crawford." Why is this relevant to Lee's career and biography? If it isn't, delete as it's offtopic
"and her career as a singer on the broadcast medium was at its zenith." I don't think you need this. The previous part of the sentence highlights her success and this is subjective.
"Radio World's Fair" should not be in quotes, as we do not put the name of events in quotes.
"By 1936, her star had faded when" Reword jargon like "her star had faded"
Merge the last three sentences in the radio singer section. Suggestion: "The introduction of Hollywood's Hays Code in 1934 contributed to Lee's decline of employment because her low-pitched voice did not conform to code's standards, which were based on females singing in higher octaves." Unless there is disagreement in the scholarship of this fact, the reader does not need to know that this theory was produced by McCracken. This sentence allows the reader to receive the same amount of information in fewer words.

Early television

"featured Columbia's popular radio singer." Change to "featured Lee as Columbia's popular radio singer."

The first paragraph of "Early television" mentions lots of information about the television capabilities of the time. I think you are trying to show who could have watched the show, but that doesn't mean people watched it. In general, the whole paragraph is offtopic. I would delete most of the statistics, shorten the information on what cities her show was broadcast in, and possibly merge it with the subsequent paragraph.
"None of the episodes still exist, as methods to record live television were not practical until late 1947." This needs to be cited.

Films and recordings

"Some of her recordings were solos and others were with various ensembles and bands, such as Anson Weeks and his Orchestra." This needs a citation.

Voice teacher to the stars

Change the title to "Voice teacher" to avoid sensationalism
"In December 1939, Lee wed Bill Boggess, with Dorothy Lamour as her bridesmaid." This should go in a "Personal life" section
"In 1940, students from Lee's own Los Angeles voice studio performed on Stage One," Delete "own"
"twenty years after her pioneering television program singing on New York's W2XAB" Delete. This information is presented earlier in the article and the time difference is no relevant.
"While making her home in Malibu Beach" Reword "making her home" as it is jargon.
"other "Dolly's" she" Reword to remove the quotation marks. Suggestion: "She also coached other singers who would play the role of Dolly in Hello, Dolly!, including Ginger Rogers, Ann Miller, Eve Arden and Pamela Britton."

Since this is a lot of comments, I will pause the review there. Once these are addressed I will conduct a reference and image check. Z1720 (talk) 18:23, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@Z1720: Thanks for the comprehensive review and suggestions for improvements. For the most part, they have all been addressed except for the lack of personal details such as birth/death dates, family, etc. Try as I might, I couldn't find this information anywhere on the web or by diligently searching Newspapers.com going back to 1910. All I found was that she was from Chicago and her father was a car dealer, as mentioned in the article. (Oddly enough, I did find there was another Harriet Lee, who was a vaudevillian in the 1910s-1920s doing a comedy/singing routine, but it's not the same person, as a NY Daily News article from Nov. 29, 1931, made clear, saying the vaudevillian Lee was "not the radio lass"). JGHowes ^talk 04:55, 8 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Don't worry about it, sometimes that happens where there are no sources for aspects of a person's life. We can only work with what we are given. I will continue the review below.

Is there any information about her death?
The caption for the first photo is s little sensational, and there isn't much information on Columbia trains or her promotion of that company in the article. I suggest something simpler, like, "Harriet Lee pictured on the Columbian in 1931"
"While with WLS, Lee sang as part of the "Harmony Team" and also played "Aunt May" on the Children's Hour show." This needs a citation
Why is Helen Haynes as a See also link at the bottom?

"Lee also appeared in several short films during the 1930s, one of which, Rambling 'Round Radio Row #5 (1933), appears on a DVD compilation of Vitaphone short films." This is not verified by the source (ref 14: [1])
It was hard to check references because links were not included in the citation. If these articles are online, a link and the database it was found on should be posted as was done for the NYT article and the Newspapers.com article.

Once the above are addressed, I will take another look. Z1720 (talk) 15:51, 8 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@Z1720: I've incorporated your comments and added some content, too. Helen Haynes was another early TV singer from that era. JGHowes ^talk 14:30, 9 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hi JGHowes, after checking the references and reviewing the article again, I believe it now achieves good article status. Congratulations! If you have any questions, please let me know. Z1720 (talk) 22:16, 9 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Z1720, many thanks. I really appreciate your helpful review comments, which have certainly resulted in an improved article. Just goes to show, Wikipedia's collaborative editing approach really does work!

— JGHowes ^talk 23:21, 9 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]